Li Yan replied, yes, she remembered the turkey dinner of 2000. We were fixated on making our own bird, downloaded recipes, bought stuffings and seasoning, gotten our stove working, but the bird was just not roasting. All others were memories of shopping strategies, or lack of shopping strategies.
Ironically, I am left all alone this year, fighting my way through the cashier's counters in Potomac Mills. Yet I'm supposed to be full and content, now that prospects have changed. I still cannot put that big and heartfelt smiles on my face. Thanksgiving is supposed to be loving and caring. I got my Dad two irregular size pants, a pair of fleece gloves for Mom, and a couple of small things for myself. I also realized that I can virtually start to count down the days that I'm leaving all these behind, sometimes feels like that I'm saying goodbye to the world, the sun system, then setting off to the other galaxy.
Not so fast, not so for sure either.
Friday, November 26, 2004
|| Habitat for Humanity Builds
Friday, the 19th of 2004, and there was something seriously wrong with me. We were more than 2 hours late. It was rather unbelievable. I drove around the town up and down, east and west, and made numerous mistakes. I was mad that morning, but fortunately, the day wasn't a total wreck. The day was meant to be one that stayed in my memories for a long period of time.
The Habitat Company is one of the largest private residential property managers in Chicago and midwest regions. On that particular day, we were helping in 2316 Byron Avenue in Richmond. The work was putting up (taping) the dry walls. Yuan and I worked a great deal, and I was just proud of myself. We did just hammering the nails for the first couple of dry walls, but quickly figured out how to measure and cut the boards. There were other carpentry techniques that are interesting, and certainly our supervisor Bill was extremely tolerant of the mediocre quality jobs from us volunteers. Bill, like all other hard working people, has an attractive sense of humor, and directs us well on the progress of the building.
But it was lots of labor. My hands were literally burning because I didn't wear gloves, and then all my physical strength seemed to be losing fast in the afternoon. Yuan and I did one bedroom closet, and one kitchen closet.
House and building house were never my dreams. I have very modest goals now, but I look at this opportunity as the start of my dreams, of owning a living space, where I will be with my families for ever and ever. I knew nothing was hard if I set my minds on it, therefore the procrastinations from the other side of the equation became all the more disappointing. I would visit here again, just look at it in far sight maybe.
The Habitat Company is one of the largest private residential property managers in Chicago and midwest regions. On that particular day, we were helping in 2316 Byron Avenue in Richmond. The work was putting up (taping) the dry walls. Yuan and I worked a great deal, and I was just proud of myself. We did just hammering the nails for the first couple of dry walls, but quickly figured out how to measure and cut the boards. There were other carpentry techniques that are interesting, and certainly our supervisor Bill was extremely tolerant of the mediocre quality jobs from us volunteers. Bill, like all other hard working people, has an attractive sense of humor, and directs us well on the progress of the building.
But it was lots of labor. My hands were literally burning because I didn't wear gloves, and then all my physical strength seemed to be losing fast in the afternoon. Yuan and I did one bedroom closet, and one kitchen closet.
House and building house were never my dreams. I have very modest goals now, but I look at this opportunity as the start of my dreams, of owning a living space, where I will be with my families for ever and ever. I knew nothing was hard if I set my minds on it, therefore the procrastinations from the other side of the equation became all the more disappointing. I would visit here again, just look at it in far sight maybe.
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
|| Leaving Overlook II
7:30pm, I was packing two boxes of things in the Overlook II building, while awaiting for a reply from the moving administrator. I totally overlooked the moving communication message and didn't know where I was moving into. But my sentiments were tinted with saddness, amid all of the funny things Bob was saying. Yes, I'm leaving.
I arrived 8am in the morning, and discovered things on my chair. I could not believe that Chris had made an earlier trip to the building and put the things there. So I pulled this glass frame out, and that was his drawing of me, my portrait. It doesn't look like me, but as we joked around later, the frame would eventually become of some use, so I should still keep it. Also there was a purple CD, in a purple case. I mentioned that Maroon 5 has just become my favorite. It just happened (did it just happen again?) that, Harriat, his ex-wife, had just sent him an anniversary gift, the Maroon 5 album. So he made me a CD. We were talking about gifting between the couple yesterday, and I reminded him that Harriat gave him the digital camera years ago.
"Yeah, that was very nice of her", he said, "and of course, she bought the same thing for her boyfriend", and "she is a lovely, lovely lady ... "
So the innocent looking is not innocent after all.
It was a nice touch, purple, song, and maroon. That was a very generous goodbye gesture. I didn't have anything to give ...
Pierre, David, Bob, Chris and I later had lunch together, in a new Chinese restaurant. Michelle, Tony and Andrew were also there. We discussed what could be on the dinner table for the December holiday party. Pierre's message this year was far less appealing, but as we have plenty of new faces in the crew, it would be interesting to see how it turns out. Right after that, a "good luck" cake for Michelle and me.
So it ends like this ...
I arrived 8am in the morning, and discovered things on my chair. I could not believe that Chris had made an earlier trip to the building and put the things there. So I pulled this glass frame out, and that was his drawing of me, my portrait. It doesn't look like me, but as we joked around later, the frame would eventually become of some use, so I should still keep it. Also there was a purple CD, in a purple case. I mentioned that Maroon 5 has just become my favorite. It just happened (did it just happen again?) that, Harriat, his ex-wife, had just sent him an anniversary gift, the Maroon 5 album. So he made me a CD. We were talking about gifting between the couple yesterday, and I reminded him that Harriat gave him the digital camera years ago.
"Yeah, that was very nice of her", he said, "and of course, she bought the same thing for her boyfriend", and "she is a lovely, lovely lady ... "
So the innocent looking is not innocent after all.
It was a nice touch, purple, song, and maroon. That was a very generous goodbye gesture. I didn't have anything to give ...
Pierre, David, Bob, Chris and I later had lunch together, in a new Chinese restaurant. Michelle, Tony and Andrew were also there. We discussed what could be on the dinner table for the December holiday party. Pierre's message this year was far less appealing, but as we have plenty of new faces in the crew, it would be interesting to see how it turns out. Right after that, a "good luck" cake for Michelle and me.
So it ends like this ...
Sunday, November 07, 2004
|| Weekend Night Shift
Had to wake up around 6am today to catch up with a friend who happened to be on a night shift on this Saturday. I was wishing that I could get up even earlier to do a 5am jog in the Deep Run park. No, I couldn't do that, but had to take some credits in the good will thinking.
I need to straighten out the basics on banking in general, which amazingly took an entire hour. Just recently I found that my comprehension over the phone is getting rusted. My mother was reading the newspaper for me, and I wasn't sure what she meant for. And this friend of mine, who spoke even faster and with a lower voice tone, totally confused me in the first 15 minutes of his advising, but fortunately, through phrasing and rephrasing, we then understood the questions and answers.
We then turned to the "moral values". I knew I was very outdated in terms of having an open mind, but honestly I had had very few examples, because my observations and imaginations were heavily biased towards my experiences this summer. The most shocking was about the roles of the newly wed women in other people's wedding ceremonies, also the attitudes of the men on having affairs.
I then asked, "where do you think that I should improve in being a person in real life?", staying quiet instead of asking questions, pretending to be needy instead of knowing everything, or what else. The answer is no, I shouldn't have to change anything on me, but I need to find a person who thinks that these characteristics are all positive merits. Unfortunately not too many of those in this world, or in that world would agree to that. Thinking back, I always went through this phase of the relationship that the mismatching habits on the other person became all the more intolerable, so severe that the overall impression on the other person turned into being negative. What I need now is a phase like that to get over the shadows and start new, but I can't.
He also gave it a shot on my million dollar question on the millennium. I knew it was for the good of me. I knew it was actually an easy one. We are in different buckets now, so we could keep our composure while proposing solutions on personal matters like this.
The call center was rather empty, then a girl came, turning on the shortwave radios and I could hear her giggling in the background. I am no longer a shanghai babe.
Then it was time for my friend to start his night shift.
I need to straighten out the basics on banking in general, which amazingly took an entire hour. Just recently I found that my comprehension over the phone is getting rusted. My mother was reading the newspaper for me, and I wasn't sure what she meant for. And this friend of mine, who spoke even faster and with a lower voice tone, totally confused me in the first 15 minutes of his advising, but fortunately, through phrasing and rephrasing, we then understood the questions and answers.
We then turned to the "moral values". I knew I was very outdated in terms of having an open mind, but honestly I had had very few examples, because my observations and imaginations were heavily biased towards my experiences this summer. The most shocking was about the roles of the newly wed women in other people's wedding ceremonies, also the attitudes of the men on having affairs.
I then asked, "where do you think that I should improve in being a person in real life?", staying quiet instead of asking questions, pretending to be needy instead of knowing everything, or what else. The answer is no, I shouldn't have to change anything on me, but I need to find a person who thinks that these characteristics are all positive merits. Unfortunately not too many of those in this world, or in that world would agree to that. Thinking back, I always went through this phase of the relationship that the mismatching habits on the other person became all the more intolerable, so severe that the overall impression on the other person turned into being negative. What I need now is a phase like that to get over the shadows and start new, but I can't.
He also gave it a shot on my million dollar question on the millennium. I knew it was for the good of me. I knew it was actually an easy one. We are in different buckets now, so we could keep our composure while proposing solutions on personal matters like this.
The call center was rather empty, then a girl came, turning on the shortwave radios and I could hear her giggling in the background. I am no longer a shanghai babe.
Then it was time for my friend to start his night shift.
Thursday, November 04, 2004
|| Somewhere Out There
I didn't realize that Cox is so congested between 5-6pm in the evening before this week. It is only because it is the last of the Overlook II that I get the leisure to drive during this time of the day. Now the actual moving day is approaching, I am becoming sentimental somehow. I've known the rhythm, the beat, and the tide; so it's sad that I will leave them all alone. Most of the memories will fade away, yet just as when I lost things in the past, I wanted to open the window and cry out loud in the air, "would you come back to me?". We don't belong to just one place, we also belong somewhere else. Yet heavy fogs block the roads and visibility is too low to tell where it is that we really belong or attach ourselves to. I can't imagine that one day when I leave this country, this world, somewhere out there, a voice says, "would you come back to me?".
July 2004, Picture provided by Chris Pollock
July 2004, Picture provided by Chris Pollock
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
|| Falling Out of Reach
Derbyshire is now renowned for being a hugely diverse county, with rural and urban life nestled within the breathtaking Derbyshire countryside. But my impressions seem to be contained with only where Elizabeth stood upon with many reflections in the novel. Years ago, I had this early morning habit to stand in the front of the Bund and watch boats running by the HuangPu river, breathing the air. They became so out of reach now ...
Picture provided by Chris Pollock
Picture provided by Chris Pollock
Monday, November 01, 2004
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