|| Damaged

My Dell laptop finally broke down, though I had anticipated this day for almost two years, I was caught up like a damaged person because I did not have a full backup and recovery is virtually impossible since I didn't have the Windows startup CD. I had lots and lots and years and years of pictures, and I thought I should pay for the mistake, so decided to use the very expensive paid service calls from Dell solution center.

The other day I was held up on highways for something like two hours for the sake of getting deals on a couple sweaters and other miscellaneous stuff, silly me. I thought of turning back, but just couldn't and persuaded myself that for one day in the entire year just let me be that silly person. The night was rainy and cold and windy, but I was able to find a few things that I like, for the season.

Other whereabouts, obviously the summer season is long gone and I was like grounded in this treacherous place. But I was busy, not for the good kind, literally running non-stop between work and hospital, checking on blood, thyroid, different kinds of vaccine .... I actually feel very normal, but admit that the recent and new damaging facts are stressful, and I don't like that.

Outside of me, two people seem to be determined to disappear from my social network, and I am fine with them and with their decisions. I don't think of them too much anyway, that is, I wouldn't want them too much anyway.

Finally, this is my favorite song from the New Moon OST, called Rosyln by Bon Iver & St. Vincent:

Up with your turret
Aren't we just terrified?
Shale, screen your worry from what you won't ever find

Don't let it fool you
Don't let it fool you...down
Down's sitting round, folds in the gown

Sea and the rock below
Cocked to the undertow
Bones blood and teeth erode, with every crashing node

Wings wouldn't help you
Wings wouldn't help you...down
Down fills the ground, gravity's proud

You barely are blinking
Wagging your face around
When'd this just become a mortal home?

Won't, won't, won't, won't

Won't let you talk me
Won't let you talk me…down
Will pull it taut, nothing let out